Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
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Doctors never put milk in their coffee for a surprising reason.
Coffee: A Beneficial Morning Energy Boost
Every morning, coffee faithfully follows us, providing the much-needed energy boost to get our day started. To enhance the flavor and attractiveness of this natural energy booster, many people add milk and sweets to their coffee.
Adding milk to coffee, however, may “dilute” the antioxidants in a freshly prepared cup.
Drinking black coffee without milk, sugar, or honey has a number of health advantages. By doing this, the coffee’s antioxidants—which have been shown to assist with a number of medical conditions—can be absorbed by the body.
Moreover, dietitians usually recommend against adding milk, sugar, or cream to coffee for anyone following a diet.
Coffee has advantages beyond just giving you a boost in energy. Let’s examine two noteworthy benefits:
One of coffee’s main ingredients, caffeine, is a natural stimulant that awakens the body from sleep and improves attention span and response time.
The effects of caffeine are amplified when combined with sugar, leaving you feeling energized and content all day long.
Coffee Guards Against Diabetes and Cardiovascular Disease: Research has demonstrated that coffee can help prevent both type 1 and type 2 diabetes. This may be connected to the caffeine and chlorogenic acid content of the drink.
Coffee has also been demonstrated to improve liver function, and its strong antioxidant content helps to prevent cell damage and shield the heart from possible harm.
Including coffee in our everyday routines brings both happiness and significant health advantages.
We may completely utilize the antioxidants in black coffee if we accept its inherent bitterness and refrain from adding milk, sugar, or cream.
Therefore, the next time you brew coffee, consider tasting it unadulterated and recognizing its health benefits.
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