While celebrating a new life and transitioning into a new role, a mother found herself struggling to get a moment alone after she welcomed her daughter. A time that was meant to be exciting for her and her husband led to them having a big fight over their parenting roles.
In the whirlwind of joy and exhaustion in the early days of parenthood, a mother found herself longing for a mere moment of quietness and alone time. She took to Reddit to share her frustrations. She started off by explaining that she had only had her child for two weeks. Her daughter was strictly breastfeeding, but in addition to cluster feeding, she realized her daughter found comfort in being close to her.
A mother holding her new born | Source: Shutterstock
This meant that her new role allowed her little to no time alone. “I’ve showered once by myself since having her, and it only lasted long enough for me to soap up before she was crying and my husband was bringing her into the bathroom with me. I think I literally had all of 2-3 minutes,” she wrote.
On the contrary, she noticed her husband’s life had not changed. He still got to have long and uninterrupted showers every day but never understood why his showers frustrated his wife.
Each time she was in the shower, and the baby would cry, her husband would bring their newborn to her to calm her down. It made her angry that he did not even try to calm the baby down on his own, but his excuse was that the child loved showers, and seeing her cry hurt him deeply.
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
As sweet as his fears sounded, the Redditor still needed to find a way to get a full self-care routine without a baby being handed over to her. So, she decided to call in help. She asked her mother to watch her daughter as she showered. Her husband was not there when she reached out to her child’s grandmother, but when he arrived, he asked what his mother-in-law was doing at their house.
Surprisingly, he was angry at his wife’s decision to call her mother just to take a shower. “I could have watched her. Why would you do that?” he asked, to which the Redditor responded, “Every time you watch her while I shower, she ends up in here with me within 2 minutes of me being in here because you don’t even try to calm her down.”
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
Therefore, after five days of trying to shave her legs, she could not wait to enjoy the warm water hitting her body and relaxing her muscles. “I need to self-care,” the Redditor emphasized.
The original poster’s honest account of her experience as a new mother erupted in a chorus of voices from commenters sharing their own experiences and offering support. One commenter challenged the husband’s logic and suggested, “If, according to hubby, showers calm her down, why isn’t he taking her on his 30-60 minute showers?”
A mother looking stressed with her child | Source: Shutterstock
Another suggestion was for the OP to lock the door as a temporary solution and to teach her husband a lesson on respecting someone’s privacy. Another Reddit user said the husband made himself look bad in front of his mother-in-law, but it was time he realized that he could also parent his daughter without always running to his wife.
The discussion took a deeper dive into the dynamics of communication and support within the relationship. Commenters pointed out the absurdity that the husband had been more concerned about his wife calling her mother rather than making sure that his wife’s well-being was attended to. “You found a way around it. And now, even knowing how hard it’s been for you, he’s still not actually concerned about you; he’s just worried about how it looks to your mum,” remarked a commenter.
A man sitting next to a crib looking stressed | Source: Shutterstock
One mother said her husband once interrupted her hair appointment but she had a serious conversation with him and made him look back at the number of haircuts he had had since their baby arrived. She told him never to interrupt her alone time unless it was an emergency, so the commenter advised the OP to have the same stern conversation with her husband.
A couple fighting | Source: Shutterstock
Another commenter shared a personal story of how her husband had slacked at the beginning of their parenting journey and how she eventually found a way to work as a team. The mother said her baby was a bit fussy on the first night home and she would always take the lead and calm her down.
But after three days, she put on earplugs and requested her husband only wake her up when the baby needed a feed and let her partner take care of the baby during the night, which led to a more equitable parenting dynamic.
The commenter added that allocating responsibilities helped them both understand the difficulty and joy of caring for a newborn, but it also allowed them to foster empathy and understanding. “That night, my partner became an equal parent,” the commenter added.
Here is a story about a newborn who cried nonstop no matter what the parents did. But they eventually realized the answer to their child’s misery was in the crib.
Julia Roberts’ Daughter Made Her Rare Appearance, but People Keep Noticing One Detail
Julia Roberts, the famous Hollywood actress, likes to keep her personal life, especially her three kids, out of the spotlight. She and her husband welcomed twins Hazel and Phinnaeus in 2004. Three years later, their son Henry was born. Though they are quite private, Julia and Daniel Moder sometimes share small glimpses of their family life with fans. This time, many fans couldn’t help but notice a particular detail about Hazel’s appearance.
Hazel made her red carpet debut at the Cannes Film Festival in 2021.
Julia Roberts’s 19-year-old daughter Hazel is stepping into the spotlight just like her mom. In 2021, she joined her dad, Daniel Moder, at the premiere of Flag Day. It’s a drama directed by and starring Sean Penn, which also features his daughter, Dylan Frances Penn, in a lead role. Daniel Moder served as the film’s cinematographer, and his daughter decided to support him on the red carpet.
At the premiere, Hazel shined in a long yellow button-up dress paired with black Mary-Jane shoes, while her dad looked sharp in a classic black suit.
Fans couldn’t help but notice a particular detail about Hazel.
Fans noticed how much Hazel resembles her mom, Julia Roberts.
With her radiant smile and striking features, Hazel looks like a younger version of the famous actress. Many pointed out the uncanny resemblance, noting that Hazel has clearly inherited her mom’s charm and elegance.
Roberts is raising her kids to have less reliance on technology.
Julia Roberts has always been protective of her children’s privacy, rarely posting pictures of them on social media. She values real-life connections with her family, away from phones and technology. In her house, one rule is to put phones away, especially during meals. “We just had sort of simple rules where we had a charging station where everyone’s phones go when you get home. There’s no phones at the table,” Julia shared in 2023.
In the interview, she said that being at home “with kids and no devices” actually “sounds like a good time” to her. Julia explained that she raised her kids to not be overly dependent on technology, reminiscing about the days “when you couldn’t get ahold of people, or they couldn’t get ahold of you.”
“I think of a family coming together at the end of the day, and you actually have things to talk about at dinner because you haven’t been in contact all day long a hundred times or a busy signal,” she said.
The actress is a proud mom of college students.
Hazel and Phinnaeus are both in college now, and Julia Roberts couldn’t be prouder. “It’s really thrilling, and I wasn’t lucky enough to have a college experience. So to see how it’s happening for them is really fascinating. And yeah, I’m just, I’m excited for them,” she opened up.
On a December 2023 episode of The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Julia shared that supporting her kids’ colleges has become a big part of her life, “You become immediately like, ’This is my entire life.’ I wear the colors, I do the whole thing.”
When Jimmy Fallon asked if her youngest son, Henry, was sad to be the only child left at home, Julia replied that while Henry missed his siblings, he also enjoyed being the sole kid at home, “I think it’s a good 50/50 split. He’s loving it. And I think he misses his people.”
She’s still a hands-on mom even though her kids are older.
Julia Roberts continues to be a hands-on mom. On the Today show, she expressed her gratitude for the ongoing involvement she has in their lives. “I parent them the same way out of the house that I parented them in the house,” the actress opened up. “Which is ’Are you getting enough sleep? You sound like you’re sick, are you drinking enough tea? Text me when you get home. I can see that you’re home safe and sound,’” Julia explained.
She continued, “And I have an immense amount of appreciation for both of my older kids because they still allow me to be the same mom to them, and it’s not eye-rolling. There’s a huge amount of understanding.”
Despite her busy schedule and the distance between them due to college, they stay connected through group calls.
She is grateful for finding work-life balance.
Julia has always valued finding a balance between work and family, and she’s grateful that she can often put her kids first. In an interview with British Vogue in 2024, Julia reflected on how achieving success early in her career allowed her to prioritize her family when her children were younger.
“I think that the luckiest aspect of my work life/family life is that the success of my work life came earlier. So by the time I had the success of my family life and had a husband and children who wanted to stay at home, I had been working for 18 years,” she said.
Julia expressed her deep gratitude for being able to pause work life to nurture her home life.
“I never force my son to say SORRY and THANK YOU — it could psychologically traumatize him,” a reader wrote to Bright Side to share her unique parenting style and to seek advice from other parents. She often faces criticism about her methods of upbringing and wants to know if other parents have had similar experiences.
Leave a Reply