Elsie just wants Josh, her grandson, to meet someone with whom he can consider settling down. When a young new teacher enrolls at her kindergarten, she thinks that she has hit the jackpot. But when Josh meets Allison, Elsie learns that they already have a connection.
I’m a meddling grandmother. Not in a bad way — I just want my grandson Josh to move along with his life. He’s 27 and spends most of his time at work or gaming.
During weekends, he stays at home, working on something around the house, or gaming.
A person gaming | Source: Pexels
“You need to get out more, Josh,” I said. “I want you to live your life to the fullest! Don’t you want to meet someone?”
“I get it, Gran,” he would say, pausing his game. “But I’m just not interested in that at the moment. Work is taking up all my time and energy, and I don’t think that’s a bad thing.”
“You’re not getting any younger,” I said, handing him chips to snack on.
“It’s because you’re surrounded by kids all day, so you just want great-grandchildren,” he laughed.
Josh wasn’t wrong. I was a kindergarten teacher, and I loved every moment of it. But I was done with the life of raising children away from their homes. Now, at 70, I wanted a quiet life of knitting and baking — a soft life, as Josh put it.
A person holding a bowl of chips | Source: Pexels
I’m leaving my position at the school at the end of the year. And maybe it’s just maternal instinct, but I wanted to know that Josh would be okay and not so alone.
Children playing with wooden blocks | Source: Pexels
A few months ago, we welcomed a new teacher at the kindergarten, Allison.
She was a few years younger than Josh, and I loved having her around during the day. So, of course, I thought about setting her up with him.
But I knew my grandson — Josh would never agree to an arranged date. He probably wouldn’t even show up.
The next best thing was to invite Allison over for dinner, where Josh would be forced to meet her.
A smiling young woman | Source: Pexels
“Alli,” I said to her one day during school. “Would you like to come over for dinner?”
“Yes! Of course, I would, Mrs. Barnard,” she said. “Since moving here, I’ve really missed family dinners. This will be great.”
I arranged for Allison to come over for dinner on a Friday evening. She went on and on about coming early to help with the cooking or bringing things over.
“Please just let me help, Mrs. Barnard,” she pleaded, as she helped me put the toys away one afternoon.
Toys scattered on the floor | Source: Pexels
“You can bring dessert,” I told her. “And call me Elsie.”
I loved her.
And I knew that she would complement Josh well.
But nothing on earth could have prepared me for the connection between Josh and Allison.
A table setting | Source: Pexels
That evening, as I was setting the table, Josh walked in.
“What’s this about?” he asked, nodding to the table.
“We’re having a new teacher over for dinner, okay?” I said, putting the cutlery in place.
“Sure, do you need me to help you?” he asked.
Cutlery in a jar | Source: Pexels
Allison arrived, her presence a breath of fresh air, carrying a cake with her.
She hugged me at the door and made herself at home — while Josh was still in his bedroom.
And then, the entire evening was turned upside down.
“Allison?” Josh’s voice came from the doorway, a mix of disbelief and an inexplicable hint of recognition.
“Josh?” Allison answered, her eyes wide. “Mrs. Barnard, this is your grandson? Josh?”
A chocolate cake | Source: Pexels
Confusion wrapped the room like a thick fog.
“Wait, you two know each other?” I asked, my heart racing at the possibilities of their connection.
“Yeah, Gran,” Josh said, sitting down.
“How?” I pressed on. We were past the niceties; I needed to know more.
“Allison is my sister,” he declared, each word resonating with the weight of a thousand unspoken stories.
The room fell silent.
A shocked older woman | Source: Pexels
“Explain, please,” I told Josh.
Josh isn’t my biological grandson. In fact, I had spent years of my life wanting a child, but I struggled with personal relationships. So, when I was 48, I took the plunge and went to an orphanage.
That’s where I met Josh. He was 5 years old and was a survivor of an accident in which his parents had died.
“Elsie,” Mandy, the social worker, said. “He’s a great kid! He’s curious, charming, and polite as ever. He just needs a chance to get out of here and live.”
A smiling little boy | Source: Pexels
When I met him, he was a scared little boy who had lost the most important people to him.
“What about the rest of his family?” I asked. “Wouldn’t they come looking?”
“There isn’t anyone else,” Mandy said. “We’ve searched. Which is why he had to be separated from his sister, too. She was adopted three weeks ago.”
“And the family didn’t want to take Josh?” I asked.
An older woman talking | Source: Pexels
“Sadly, no,” Mandy admitted. “They just wanted the youngest child we had, so that they could have as much of her childhood as possible.”
In the end, despite my asking for more information about Josh’s sister, there was just no way such confidential information could be given out.
I adopted Josh as his grandmother because I was already going gray, and I didn’t want anyone to ask him why his mother was so old.
A smiling little girl | Source: Pexels
Eventually, on his 15th birthday, I told him the truth about the adoption — but nothing about his sister because I just didn’t have the information.
So, Josh has known the truth — or as much of the truth as possible.
“Tell me,” I pressed on.
“Gran, after you told me the truth about me being adopted, I felt settled. I mean, you had chosen me, after all. But I just felt that there was more to the story, you know?”
A boy standing with birthday balloons | Source: Pexels
I nodded. I didn’t want to interrupt him. But I would choose this boy every single time.
“So, a few months ago, I went back to the orphanage, and I was told about a sister — Allison. And they were able to give me information because we were biological siblings.”
“And then, Josh found me on Facebook,” Allison chimed in. “We’ve been talking for a while. Although, he didn’t tell me the truth at first.”
“Well, I didn’t know if you knew the truth or not,” Josh retorted. “I couldn’t just say that I found your details in an old file at an orphanage.”
A stack of old files | Source: Pexels
“I didn’t think that our first meeting would happen here, in your home,” Allison said.
“I think we need some dinner,” I said, waking up to get the food.
As we sat down at the table, I silently observed Josh and Allison’s reunion. I had absolutely no idea that there was a possibility that they could have known each other, let alone be siblings.
Josh ate quietly, processing his thoughts while he chewed. Allison’s eyes were glazed over — I wondered what she was thinking, and whether she was okay.
Food on a table | Source: Pexels
“Gran, why did you invite Allison over?” Josh asked, pouring more wine.
“Because I wanted to play matchmaker,” I said honestly.
Allison started giggling, and soon the room echoed with laughter.
The sense of awkwardness that had initially overwhelmed me transformed into a profound joy — I had hoped to bring love into Josh’s life, never imagining it would come in the form of a sister’s bond long severed by fate.
But their roles in each other’s lives were restored.
Wine being poured | Source: Pexels
Later, when Allison took it upon herself to do the dishes, Josh and I stood outside.
“I can’t believe this,” Josh whispered, his voice cracking with emotion as he turned to me.
“I’m as surprised as you are,” I said, looking at the night sky.
“You’ve given me so much,” he said. “And now, you’ve unknowingly brought Allison back. We’ve been talking, but neither of us had the courage to actually meet.”
The rest of the night unfolded with stories of childhood memories lost and found, of heartaches and hope, and the unshakeable bond of family.
A man looking at the stars | Source: Pexels
As I lay in bed that night, the house quiet once more, I couldn’t help but feel that their meeting was predestined by some other force.
At least now, Allison will be in Josh’s life, in some capacity or another.
A smiling older woman | Source: Pexels
Do you have any similar stories?
How to Own Your Dream Home
For most people, their first home isn’t their dream home. It starts off nice enough. But as time goes by and your family grows, starter homes tend to get a little . . . cramped.
But don’t hate on your current home too much. Because while it gave you a safe and dry place to lay your head at night, it was also setting you up to own your dream home someday.
We’ll show you how it all works and walk you through the steps that’ll get you in your dream home—one you can actually afford!
How to Get Your Dream Home in 5 Steps
Here are the steps:
- Follow the Financial Basics
- Find Out How Much Equity You Have
- Set Your New Home-Buying Budget
- Find the Right Dream Home for You
- Be Picky and Patient
Now let’s cover each step in more detail.
Step 1: Follow the Financial Basics
First thing’s first—you have to get out of debt, get on a budget, and build up an emergency fund of 3–6 months of expenses. Sounds pretty basic, right? If you haven’t completed these steps, then you’re not ready to upgrade to your dream home . . . yet.
Now, when you’ve got house fever, it can be hard to focus on paying off debt or saving an emergency fund before you upgrade your home—especially when you’re feeling the pressure of rising home prices and interest rates.
But whether it’s your second or third house, you should only buy a home when you’ve covered the financial basics we mentioned above. Then you’ll be ready to start the journey toward owning your dream house.
And that journey starts with your home equity. What’s equity? Well, we’re glad you asked . . . that brings us to the next step.
Step 2: Find Out How Much Equity You Have
Home equity is a pretty simple concept: It’s your current home’s value minus whatever you still owe on your mortgage.
See, in most cases, your home’s value increases over time. Similar to other long-term investments (like retirement accounts), homes gradually increase in value. There have been periods of ups and downs in the market to be sure, but the value of real estate has consistently gone up. According to the St. Louis Federal Reserve, the average sale price of a home has increased over 2,300% from 1965 to 2023! And in the last ten years (2013 to 2023), there’s been a 68% increase.1 As your home increases in value, so does your equity. In real estate terms, this is called appreciation.
Other factors that increase your home’s equity include:
- Added value: Home improvement projects like adding square footage, updating fixtures and appliances, or even just slapping on a new coat of paint can add value to your home.
- Mortgage paydown: Paying down your mortgage not only gets you out of debt faster, it also builds your equity. The less you owe on your home, the more equity you have.
The amount of equity you have gives you a pretty good idea of how much money you’ll end up with after selling your house. You can use that money to make a hefty down payment and cover the other costs that come with buying a home.
Find expert agents to help you buy your home.
So, how do you determine your home’s value? Well, you can get a ballpark estimate on real estate websites like Zillow, ask a trusted real estate agent to perform a competitive market analysis (which they’ll do anyway if they’re helping you sell your house), or get a professional appraisal.
Finding out your home’s equity will involve a little math, but it’s third-grade-level stuff, so don’t sweat it.
Here’s what we mean. Let’s say your home’s current value is $355,000. When you sell that house, you’ll have to pay for between 1–3% of the sale price in closing costs, another 6% in fees for the real estate agent who helped you sell it, and whatever’s left to pay off on your mortgage.
That means you can estimate clearing over $223,000 from selling your house. That’s a killer down payment on your dream home! And if your home is paid off, that’s even more money to put down and use to pay for things like repairs and moving expenses.
Step 3: Set Your Dream Home Budget
Once you know how much you’ll clear from the sale of your home, you can start making a budget for your dream home.
The key to owning your dream home (instead of it owning you) is to keep your mortgage payment to no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage, along with paying a down payment of at least 20% to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI). Never get a 30-year mortgage even if the bank offers it (and they will). You’d pay a fortune in interest—money that should go toward building your wealth, not the bank’s.
So, let’s say your take-home pay is $4,800 a month. That means your monthly mortgage payment shouldn’t be any bigger than $1,200. By the way, that 25% figure should also include other home fees collected every month with the mortgage payment like homeowners association (HOA) fees, insurance premiums and property taxes.
Plug your numbers into our mortgage calculator to see how much house you can afford.
And don’t forget to budget for all those other costs that come with the home-buying process in addition to your closing fees—things like moving expenses and any upgrades or repairs you might need to make. You don’t want these hidden costs to catch you off guard or drain your emergency fund.
Step 4: Find the Right Dream Home for You
This is where things get real. After all your hard work building up your equity (and doing a lot of math—don’t forget that), you’re finally ready to start the house hunt. Woo-hoo!
But don’t lose focus. Stay zoned in by making a list of features that make a home fit your budget, lifestyle and dreams—and stick to it throughout your house hunt. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
- Don’t compromise on location and layout. If you plan to be in this home for the long haul, an out-of-the-way neighborhood or a wacky floor plan is a deal breaker. Look for a community and layout that’ll suit your lifestyle now and for years to come.
- Think about how much space your family needs. While your budget has the final say about how much home you buy, you’ll want your dream home to fit your family’s needs through different life seasons.
- Consider the school districts. If you have or want kids, the quality of the nearby school districts is probably already on your mind. But even if you don’t have kids or you’re retired, keep in mind that having good schools nearby could increase your home’s value.
- Look for a house that’ll grow in value. Are home values rising in the area? Is the number of businesses going up? These factors can help you figure out whether your dream home will turn into a good investment.
- Count the costs. Want that fancy master bathroom with the multiple showerheads and the Jacuzzi tub? Be clear on what’s a must-have and what’s nice to have. And don’t forget, upgraded features like that will make your dream home more expensive.
Step 5: Be Picky and Patient
We know you’re anxious to get into those new digs, but be patient. Wait for the right house at the right time. Don’t spend your money on a less-than-ideal home just because you’re tired of looking.
The key is finding a good real estate agent who understands your budget and refuses to settle for “good enough.” They’re as committed to your dream as you are and will have your back throughout the entire process, no matter what it takes.
In addition to teaming up with a great real estate agent, you can take a couple of extra steps to make sure you’re ready to strike as soon as the right home comes up:
- Get preapproved for a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage. Having preapproved financing is a green flag for sellers—especially in multiple offer situations. And because this puts most of your information in the lender’s system, you’ll be on the fast track to closing once your offer is accepted.
- Offer earnest money with your bid. Earnest money is a deposit to show you’re truly interested in a home. Usually it’s 1–2% of the home’s purchase price and it’s applied to your down payment or closing costs. Even if the deal falls through, you can almost always get most of it back.
Find a Real Estate Expert in Your Local Market
Now, you might be thinking you have some work to do before you’re ready to find your dream home. Or you may be realizing your years of hard work are about to pay off! Regardless, if you follow these steps, you’ll find the house you’ve always wanted and avoid a purchase you’ll regret.
Once you’re ready, connect with one of our RamseyTrusted real estate agents. These are high-performing agents who do business the Ramsey way and share your values so you can rest easy knowing the search for your dream home is in the right hands.
Find the only real estate agents in your area we trust, and start the hunt for your dream home!
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