My mother had a clear favorite her entire life, while I was raised by my grandparents mostly. When she got old and sick, I helped financially but refused to do more than that for a crucial reason.
While most good parents would tell you that they don’t have a favorite, my mother was not ashamed to tell me that my brother, Stanley, was her golden boy. My father walked out of our family because caring for two children became too much.
In the end, my mother blamed me for it. “He wouldn’t have left if I hadn’t gotten pregnant with you,” she told me one day. I was just a child at the time and only wanted my mother’s love.
“But that’s not my fault,” I replied. “I didn’t ask to be born.”
“Don’t talk back to me! I’m the parent, and you’re the kid, so shut up,” she finished. We would have similar conversations through the years whenever she was mad at me. Finally, my mother sent me to live with my paternal grandparents.
They felt so bad that our father had walked away from our lives that they took me in and gave me all the love I never received at home. That’s how I learned that the word family has lots of meanings.
All I heard about my mother and brother over the years was that she helped him with everything. He got into some trouble with the police, and my mother paid all his legal fees. Eventually, she had to sell her house and pay for his apartment.
Stanley was spoiled and couldn’t hold down a job, but my mother coddled him. Meanwhile, my grandparents didn’t have much money, but they gave me everything they could. I had to work to afford my college and my home.
I learned a whole ton of responsibility, and when I graduated, I got a pretty decent job. That’s where I met my husband, Lawrence. We had two daughters whom I cherished equally. When my grandparents got sick, I was there for them until the very end.
They gave me their house, and one of my daughters moved there when she got married. Unfortunately, my husband died shortly after her wedding. She asked me to live with her, but I wanted to stay in our home.
I didn’t hear from my brother or my mother for many years. They didn’t care about me at all, so why should I care about them? But one day, Stanley called. “Hello?” I answered the phone.
“Hey, Brooke. It’s Stanley. How are you?” my brother said through the other line.
“Oh, hey, Stanley. Long time, no speak. I’m fine. How about you?” I replied.
“Yeah, it’s been a while. Listen, I’m calling because Mom broke her hip. I need your help,” Stanley continued.
“Oh, that’s too bad. Is she ok?” I asked.
“She’s fine. It’s just that the hospital bill will be pretty expensive, and I need help paying for it. She’s our mother after all,” he explained.
“Oh, well. Ok. Give me the details, and I’ll send some money,” I told him. My husband and I had accumulated decent savings, so I could afford to send Stanley some money for whatever our mother needed.
“That’s great, Brooke. Thank you. I’ll talk to you later,” Stanley said and hung up. I didn’t feel any obligation to my mother, but I wasn’t heartless. I sent him the money and forgot about it until a week later when my brother called again.
“Hey, Brooke!” Stanley started.
“Hey. How did everything go?” I asked.
“The operation for her hip went well, but the doctor just told me she’s going to need tons of rehab and round-the-clock care. I was wondering when you could come to pick her up?” my brother asked.
“What do you mean pick her up?” I probed, confused.
“I told you. She needs someone to take care of her. I’ve been by her side our whole lives. It’s time you take responsibility, Brooke. I can’t watch her,” Stanley added.
“Excuse me? Responsibility? Mom sent me to live with our grandparents because she hated me, and you were her golden boy. She essentially abandoned me,” I snapped.
“Please. Stop the melodrama. You need to step up because she needs you. She gave you life. You owe her,” Stanley demanded.
“No. I don’t owe her anything. I needed my mother when I was growing up, and she refused. She gave all her love to you, so you will need to figure out something. I gave you money for her hospital bills out of the goodness of my heart, but I won’t be her caretaker,” I told him.
“YOU’RE HORRIBLE, BROOKE! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS? I CAN’T WATCH HER!” Stanley started screaming through the phone.
“Honestly, I don’t care, Stanley. You don’t get to call me horrible. I was a kid when she abandoned me, and my grandparents became my REAL PARENTS. Don’t call me again!” I finished and hung up the call.
Stanley tried calling, texting, e-mailing, and more for several days, but I blocked him. He also tried contacting my daughters, but they refused to listen to him. They knew my history with that side of the family.
Of course, Stanley and my mother bad-mouthed me to anyone who would listen. I have been severely judged for my decision, but I didn’t listen to their criticism. After all, no one ever judged my mother for what she did to me.
What can we learn from this story?
- Caring for your loved ones is important. While Brooke’s choice is controversial, it’s easy to understand her point of view, given her background.
- Forgiveness is divine. Sometimes, you have to be the bigger person. Caring for your parents when they’re old is a big duty, both financially and emotionally. Someone has to do it.
Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.
If you enjoyed this story, you might like this one about a mother who left her disabled daughter at an orphanage.
King Charles’ very unexpected ‘competitive’ hobby he shares with wife Queen Camilla
King Charles and Queen Camilla have a happy marriage, but there’s one hobby they get really competitive about, according to Camilla’s son, Tom Parker Bowles. In his new cookbook, Cooking and the Crown, which features royal-inspired recipes, Tom shared that the couple loves collecting mushrooms and are very competitive about who finds the most. King Charles has enjoyed this hobby for years, and now it’s something they both take seriously! Tom revealed this while introducing his recipe for fresh pappardelle with porcini mushrooms.
Tom wrote that King Charles and Queen Camilla are “obsessed” with collecting wild mushrooms and are very competitive about how much they find. He also praised King Charles for his eco-friendly approach to food, calling him a “true food hero.” According to Tom, the King knows a lot about rare types of cattle, old varieties of plums and apples, the benefits of mutton, wild mushrooms, and even the strong appeal of smelly cheese!
Every monarch has their own favorite foods and habits, and King Charles is known for his passion for sustainable, eco-friendly farming. He’s been focused on this long before it became popular, and his advice is very valuable because of how much he knows.
Tom, a food critic who grew up with Queen Camilla and her ex-husband Andrew Parker Bowles, recently shared that Camilla was strict about food when he was a child, making sure he followed a healthy diet.
In an interview, Tom shared that he grew up eating food that was local, seasonal, and organic, long before those terms became popular. His mother, Queen Camilla, would shop at small, local stores like the butcher, fishmonger, bakery, and greengrocer. Although Tom liked some processed foods, they were rare in his home. He also said his mother, who he praised as a “good cook,” kept a close eye on what they were allowed to eat.
Tom joked that when a Sainsbury’s supermarket opened in Chippenham in the early ’80s, it felt like everything changed from black-and-white to full color, just like in The Wizard of Oz. Suddenly, there were exciting foods like Ice Magic, Birds Eye Chicken Pies, Butterscotch Angel Delight, and big packs of Monster Munch. He and his siblings wanted to try it all, but his mother, Queen Camilla, was still pretty strict about what they could eat.
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