Ali MacGraw became a Hollywood superstar overnight. But just as quickly as she rose to fame, she disappeared from show business altogether.
Today, the 84-year-old actress has settled down in a remote and tiny town, and she’s aging gracefully with her grey hair.
Ali MacGraw
Ali MacGraw – born Elizabeth Alice MacGraw – was born on April 1, 1939, in Pound Ridge, New York, USA. Her mother, Frances, was an artist and worked at a school in Paris, later settling in Greenwich Village. She married Richard MacGraw, who was also an artist. In 1939, Ali was born.
Ali’s father Richard supposedly had issues from his own childhood which made him a little bit different from others.
He had survived a terrible childhood in an orphanage, running away at the age of 16 to go to sea. He would later study at an art school in Munich, Germany.
“Daddy was frightened and really, really angry. He never forgave his real parents for giving him up,” Ali explained, saying said her father’s adult life was spent “suppressing the rage that covered all his hurt.”
Ali MacGraw – childhood
Money was short for their family, too. Frances and Richard, together with Ali and her brother, Richard Jr, had to move into a house on a Pound Ridge wilderness preserve which they shared with an elderly couple.
“There were no doors; we shared the kitchen and bathroom with them,” Ali said. “It was utter lack of privacy. It was horrible.”
Mom Francis worked with several commercial-art assignments and supported the family. At the same time, Richard had a hard time selling his paintings, and as a result became very frustrated. Ali’s brother Richard became a victim for his anger at home.
“On good days he was great, but on bad days he was horrendous,” she recalled. “Daddy would beat my brother up, badly. I was witness to it, and it was terrible.”
Ali was the daughter of artists, and she knew that she, too, wanted to go into a creative line of work as she got older. She earned a scholarship at the prep school Rosemary Hall, and in 1956, she moved to study at Wellesley College in Massachusetts.
By the age of 22, Ali MacGraw moved to New York and got her first job as an assistant editor at Harper’s Bazaar, working with photographers as an assistant.
Fashion work in New York
Fashion editor Diana Vreeland hired Ali as, what she recalls as, a “flunkie”. Ever seen the film The Devil Wears Prada? Well, it was pretty much that.
“It was ‘Girl! Get me a pencil!’,” MacGraw recalled.
The future Hollywood celebrity worked her job as an assistant for several months. Then, about six months in, fashion photographer Melvin Sokolsky noticed her beautiful looks, and Ali MacGraw was hired as a stylist,and given a better salary. She’d end up staying in that position for six years.
“I don’t know where she got this work ethic, but Ali would come in at eight a.m., and many times I’d come back at one in the morning and she would still be doing things for the next day,” Ruth Ansel, a former art director of Vanity Fair and Harper’s Bazaar recalls.
Ali was great as a stylist. But soon, she was asked to work in front of the cameras as a model. It didn’t take long before she was on magazine covers all over the world, even appearing in television commercials. For thing led to another, and Ali tumbled headfirst into the profession of acting.
She had been sketched nude by Salvador Dali a couple of years earlier. But when the surrealist artist started sucking her toes, MacGraw decided that she’d rather be an actress than a model.
Ali MacGraw – films
Ali went straight from an unknown stylist and into the world of cinema, and boy, did she do it with a bang.
She was untutored in the art of film, which gave her acting another dimension. Her natural beauty was stunning, and the audience loved her.
Following a small role in A Lovely Way to Die (1968), she was asked to star in the 1969 film Goodbye, Columbus. It turned out to be a great call, with MacGraw receiving a Golden Globe for Most Promising Newcomer – Female. The following year, she got her big international breakthrough with a role that would pretty much sum up her career.
Ali MacGraw had received a script from her agent. She’d read it and wept twice because of how much she loved it. She decided she really wanted a part in it, and got herself a meeting with the film’s producer Robert Evans – who at the time was Paramount Picture’s head of production – at the Beverly Hills Hotel’s Polo Lounge. Not only did Evans think she was perfect for the part in the movie Love Story, he absolutely fell in love with her.
MacGraw – playing the role of Jenny – acted alongside Ryan O’Neal in the movie Love Story. The American romantic drama film, in which Ali played a working-class college student, became a smash hit.
Love Story hit the cinemas in 1970, and wow did the audience cherish it. It became the No. 1 film in the United States, and at the time, it was the sixth highest grossing movie in history in the US and Canada.
Award-winning actress
MacGraw earned an Academy Award nomination for her role, and the film itself earned her another win and five Academy Award Nominations. She also won herself a second Golden Globe as Best Actress in a Motion Picture – Drama.
Film producer Robert Evans not only loved her on screen, he had fallen in love with her in real life, and that love was reciprocated. In 1969, the couple tied the knot, and two years later, they welcomed their son, Josh Evans.
Ali MacGraw was the hot new star of the 1970s, but her private life and marriage with Evans would soon come to an end. Steve McQueen had visited their home to ask her to star alongside him in The Getaway, and the two Hollywood stars clicked right away.
“I looked in those blue eyes, and my knees started knocking,” MacGraw recalled. “I became obsessed.”
MacGraw and McQueen had an affair, and she soon left Evans to live with the actor in Malibu, along with her son Josh.
“Steve was this very original, principled guy who didn’t seem to be part of the system, and I loved that,” she said.
Ali MacGraw – Steve McQueen
But after a while, Ali realized that Steve McQueen had his own problems. Following his father abandoning his mother, a then-14-year-old Steve was sent to a school for delinquent children. MacGraw said he never trusted women after that.
(Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Getty Images)
He didn’t like that she worked and had her own career. For a while, Ali stayed home to raise their sons. But her husband’s demands were something Ali simply couldn’t accept in the long run.
Not only that, but he’d explode if she even looked at another man. He also wanted her to sign a prenuptial agreement, promising not to ask for anything if they’d divorce. She abided by the agreement when they did divorce in 1978.
“I couldn’t even go to art class because Steve expected his ‘old lady’ to be there every night with dinner on the table,” she recalled.
“Steve’s idea of hot was not me. He liked blond bimbos, and they were always around.”
This was the start of a pretty dark time in MacGraw’s life. She arrived on set to shoot the 1978 film Convoy both drunk and high, which prompted her to quit drugs.
I Found an Envelope in My MIL’s First Aid Kit – She and My Husband Had an Agreement Behind My Back
My mother-in-law’s “helpful” visits after my baby’s birth seemed innocent until I discovered an envelope hidden in her bathroom. What’s worse, the emails inside and legal documents revealed a betrayal that I never saw coming.
I sat in my living room, staring at the mess of baby supplies while my five-month-old son Ethan napped in his swing. Ruth, my mother-in-law, stood in front of me with her perfect posture and concerned smile.
A woman in her 60s smiling while standing in a messy living room full of baby stuff | Source: Midjourney
“Why don’t you all stay at my house for a few days?” she suggested. “I have plenty of room, and you clearly need the support, dear.”
Before I could respond, Nolan jumped in. “That’s a great idea, Mom.” He turned to me, his expression pleading. “It will be good to have some help for a while. And Ethan will be in good hands.”
I wanted to say no. Ruth had been all up in our business since Ethan was born, always showing up unannounced or offering to take him to her house so I could “rest.” At first, I was thankful.
A tired-looking woman in her 30s holding a crying baby in a messy living room | Source: Midjourney
I was beyond exhausted from sleepless nights and juggling everything as a new mom. I didn’t even notice how overbearing she had become.
“You know, when I was raising Nolan, we did things differently. The right way,” she’d say while reorganizing my kitchen cabinets without asking. “Babies need structure, dear. They need experienced hands.”
As the weeks went by, Ruth grew more intense. She even converted her spare bedroom into a full nursery, complete with a crib, changing table, and rocking chair. She also bought duplicates of all of Ethan’s favorite toys.
A baby’s room | Source: Pexels
When I mentioned it seemed excessive, she just laughed. “Oh, Emma, you can never be too prepared! Besides, Ethan needs a proper space at Grandma’s house.”
Now here she was, suggesting we stay at her place. Nolan and her both stared at me expectantly, waiting for an answer.
I couldn’t fight them. I was just too tired. “Sure,” I mumbled. “A few days.”
So we crashed at my mother-in-law’s place for the night, and at exactly 7:30 a.m. the next morning, she was in the guest room doorway.
A woman smiling while standing at a doorway with her hands clasped | Source: Midjourney
“Oh, good morning! It’s the perfect time to get our sweet little pumpkin up. Have you fed him yet? Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it,” she chirped.
Trying not to groan, I rose from the bed and walked out of the guest room while she fussed around in the nursery. The surroundings only made me feel worse. Her house was far from welcoming to me.
I always felt like an intruder there. The living room was immaculate, like a museum where nothing was meant to be touched. Family photos covered the walls, mostly of Nolan at various ages, with Ruth front and center in each one.
A home’s hallway with photos hanging on the walls | Source: Midjourney
I should’ve been grateful that we had help from family. Ruth was experienced and organized like no one else in the world. But I just couldn’t shake how uncomfortable this whole situation made me.
Before I reveal what happened next, I will say that you have to trust your intuition, especially after you become a mother. But hindsight is 20-20, right?
Looking back, all the signs were there. Ruth’s constant presence and her subtle criticisms wrapped in sweet concern were red flags. I just hadn’t put all the signs together yet, or I didn’t see how anyone could try to do something so… malicious.
An angry woman with her arms crossed in a messy kitchen | Source: Midjourney
Anyway, Ruth fed and got Ethan back to sleep almost straight away. It was still early, so she managed to convince Nolan to go grocery shopping.
Meanwhile, I had developed a pounding headache, so once they were gone, I went into Ruth’s bathroom to look for some painkillers. That’s when I saw a manila envelope shoved in the back of her first aid kit.
Weird. Why would there be an envelope in a medicine cabinet? It felt extremely out of place. Curiosity got the best of me, so I grabbed it.
A manila envelope sitting inside a medicine cabinet | Source: Midjourney
I’m glad I peeked inside, although I would always advocate for other people’s privacy. In this case, though, the universe was telling me to do it.
Because as soon as I realized what I was reading, my blood ran cold. The envelope contained notes and documents that Ruth had carefully prepared. After putting all the puzzle pieces together, the intent was clear: she wanted to take Ethan from me.
The words “Custody Proceedings” jumped out in a particularly wordy set of papers stapled together. I realized with horror that these had been issued by an actual law firm.
A set of legal papers that say “Custody Proceedings” | Source: Midjourney
Aside from that, the notes mentioned my every movement concerning chores and mothering duties:
“Emma sleeping while the baby cries – 10 minutes (photo attached)”
“House in disarray during surprise visit”
“Mother seems uninterested in proper feeding schedule”
All this time, while she was pretending to help, Ruth had been building a case against me. Photos I never knew she’d taken showed me at my worst moments: exhausted, crying, and overwhelmed.
A horrible image showed me breaking down on the back porch the one time I thought no one could see me.
A worried woman standing on the porch of a house | Source: Midjourney
But the real punch to the gut came from the email thread with a family lawyer.
“As discussed, my son Nolan agrees that his wife Emma is unfit to be Ethan’s primary caregiver,” Ruth had written. “She’s too tired to argue, which works in our favor. Soon, Ethan will be where he belongs: with me.”
My husband was involved in this too. I couldn’t even understand how or why. We were struggling, but we were doing fine for first-time parents.
A shocked woman holding papers while standing in a bathroom | Source: Midjourney
My first instinct was to rip everything to shreds or set it on fire right there in her pristine bathroom. Instead, I took out my phone with trembling hands and photographed every single page. I needed evidence.
I had just returned to the living room when Nolan and Ruth came back from their grocery run. My whole body shook with rage as I pulled out the envelope and slammed it on the dining table.
“What is this?” I demanded.
Nolan’s face went pale. “Where did you find this?”
A man looking shocked | Source: Midjourney
Ruth rushed in behind him. “Now, Emma, let me explain. This is all for Ethan’s well-being.”
“His well-being?” I laughed, but it came out more like a sob. “You mean your well-being. You’ve been planning this for months, haven’t you?”
“Emma, you have to understand,” Nolan stammered. “It was just a precaution, in case you didn’t get better.”
“Better?” I turned to him, my voice rising. “Better from what? Being a new mom? How could you? Were you really going to let your mother take our son?”
A woman yelling and gesturing with her hands | Source: Midjourney
Nolan’s next words destroyed whatever was left of our marriage.
“Come on, Emma,” he sighed. “I don’t think we thought it through when you got pregnant. We’re too young for this. You don’t even pay attention to me anymore. Having Mom raising Ethan just makes sense, and we can focus on ourselves.”
“You have GOT to be kidding me!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “Are you that selfish? You don’t get enough attention, so you plot to take MY BABY from me?!”
“Emma, don’t yell,” Ruth scolded me. “You’ll wake the baby. You see? You’re too emotional to be a mother. Focus on being a good wife first, and then, we can talk about some visits.”
A woman holding her palm up | Source: Midjourney
I had no more words, though my feelings raged like never before. If I were a dragon, I would’ve burned down her house. But I took a deep breath, focusing on sounding cool and collected when I finally spoke.
“You won’t get away with this.”
With that, I ran to the nursery where Ethan was still sleeping, scooped him up, and headed for the door. Ruth tried to block my path.
Baby sleeping in a crib | Source: Pexels
“Emma, you’re being hysterical. You can’t take this child! We’ll call the police!” she threatened, reaching for Ethan.
I pulled away from her. “Don’t you dare touch him!” I grabbed the diaper bag and my purse. “Call the police and I’ll tell them how you tried to rob a mother of her child! We’ll see who they side with!”
At the door, I turned back and gave my soon-to-be ex-husband a scorching glance as I said, “Stay away from us.”
With that, I left that house and drove straight to my friend Angelina’s house as carefully but as quickly as I could. Luckily, Ethan slept peacefully in his car seat, unaware that his whole world had just shifted.
Baby strapped to a car seat | Source: Pexels
That night, after crying on Angelina’s shoulder and putting Ethan to bed in her spare room, I started making calls. I found a lawyer who specialized in family law and emailed her the photos I’d taken of Ruth’s documents.
The next few weeks were brutal. It was a bunch of legal meetings and court appearances that only made my anxiety skyrocket. Luckily, the police never got involved.
But Ruth and her lawyers tried to argue that she was just a concerned grandmother. She was probably not expecting my representative to use all the gathered notes and photos to prove that her intentions were nothing but manipulative.
An older woman sitting in court with a serious expression | Source: Midjourney
Also, when questioned, Nolan acted like a baby, confessing to doing everything his mother wanted. Once the judge heard that, he understood the truth.
So, Ruth didn’t just lose any chance at custody, but she also got slapped with a restraining order at my lawyer’s insistence. She can’t come within 500 feet of me or Ethan.
I filed for divorce from Nolan one week after custody was settled. The agreement gave him only supervised visitation rights. He didn’t even fight it. He probably knew he didn’t have a leg to stand on after everything that happened before.
Court papers for marriage dissolution | Source: Pexels
Now, Ethan and I are back in our house, making it our own again. To get rid of the painful memories, I painted the walls with new colors, rearranged all the furniture, and got my life together.
Sometimes I still get tired, but what mom doesn’t? Also, it’s much better now that I’m not dealing with a useless husband and a scheming mother-in-law.
And when my days seem endless, I remember Ethan’s sweet smile staring up at me, his momma, and that’s all I need to keep going.
A woman smiling while holding a laughing baby | Source: Midjourney
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